Tradition!Tradition! Sorry, I have a little bit of Jewish blood in me and every once in a while when making wedding plans I want to burst into that song from Fiddler on the Roof. Everything about the wedding seems to have some sort of tradition behind it. But when it came time to discuss the wedding ceremony we drew a blank. We knew there were some aspects of the Christian wedding ceremony that we wanted, but what else did we want to include? I hated the idea of just doing things in the ceremony for the sake of doing them. I wanted to know why we do them, and if I didn't like the meaning, I wasn't going to include it.
We decided to write our own vows. Ok, well, we are trying to write our own vows. It's a little harder than it sounds. We've worked on it together and separately. Hopefully we'll be able to get it done before the wedding. The traditional vows work, but we both liked the idea of making this promise something personal. Each couple has to choose for themselves. We just didn't like the idea of repeating words that didn't necessarily mean anything personally to us.
There are all kinds of options for the wedding ceremony. With my Jewish background we might decide to stand under a huppah, a special canopy that was built to provide privacy during the ceremony, or break a glass, symbolizing the frailty of marriage and a reminder that we need to take good care of it. Because of our joint belief in Jesus Christ and our faith in Him as Savior, we want some of His words concerning marriage included in our ceremony. We could light a unity candle, symbolizing our two lives coming together and becoming inseparable.
There are options for the wedding ceremony that come from every nationality and religion. Catholic wedding ceremonies tend to last very long because every attender has the chance to take communion. Filipino weddings used to last three days, though most are now traditional Catholic weddings. In India, couples hold rice, oats, and green leaves during the ceremony to represent wealth, good health, and happiness (World Wide Traditions.com).
Everything about a wedding is full of symbolism. I will be wearing a absolutely beautiful white dress because I am coming to Jeff as a virgin. Even as far back as Bible times, the bride wore white to represent her purity. The tradition of throwing the garter started back in the 14th century when brides would do it to keep the men at the party from taking it from her. She would throw her bouquet because brides were considered to be very lucky on their wedding day and it kept people from tearing pieces of her dress off for good luck. When we get home that night Jeff will attempt to carry me over the threshold, a symbol of welcome into his home.
Whatever traditions you choose to incorporate, make the day special to you and your man. Don't just do things for the sake of doing them. This is a day to celebrate you as a couple. Don't do it just because your parents and your grandparents did, unless it means something to you. This is the start of a new family and you have the right to make your own traditions. Make it your day and enjoy every minute of it.
Resources
(2004). Wedding Traditions in Asia. Retrieved from http://www.worldweddingtraditions.com/locations/asian_traditions.html
Fairchild, M. (2009). Wedding Customs-Covenant Symbols in Christian Wedding Customs and Traditions. About.com, Retrieved from http://christianity.about.com/od/weddingceremony/a/weddingtraditions_2.htm
PIB Weddings, . (2009). Wedding Traditions and Their Origins. Retrieved from http://www.pibweddings.com/traditionsorigins.html
The Knot, . (2009). Ceremony: Jewish Wedding Rituals. Retrieved from http://wedding.theknot.com/real-weddings/jewish-weddings/articles/jewish-wedding-ceremony-rituals.aspx?MsdVisit=1
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